the ides of...change...

march used to be the first month of the year and was named for the god of war. war brings change. the first is the beginning. and so it is. march.2012. happy new year.
this new year comes with change and growth in a positive direction. growth and occupation of new lands from war. i fought through 2011 and rounded it out apparently in the beginnings of 2012. but using march as my starting point i begin again. i have switched job sites after struggling for months to find footing and constantly slipping. it took a lot of soul searching and letting go to come to that decision because i have so much love and respect for the mission of the CDP and the kids there. but alas...i just couldn't quite find my niche and so i moved. i now find myself surrounded by a crew of girls with a variety of problems and so so so much love to give. while i am continuing my work with an at-risk population this one comes with a little more stability and thus better footing. it has taken me a short amount of time to find my ground and begin to step. and i am so fully supported in this mission. i have been building my own personal skill set and challenging my mind. i have been reading journal articles and searching treatment programs to leave an impression that may last and be meaningful. i have remembered that i am a psychologist. and a good one. a passionate one. an insightful one.
something strange has been happening to me over the past couple of days. i have settled. in a way that is indescribable to anyone who is not in this experience but in a way that is so magnificent and life changing. i am stretching myself and my skin...growing into the self i always projected myself to be. settled in a world that is not my own but is giving me the space and inspiration to fold into me. i am reconnecting with the true definition of me.