some days...

Some days...I love you Sent Lisi...with your sea breezes promising to blow away any discomfort or uncertainties. On these days it seems everything will always be right. I love you when my day is full of kids doing it...living and loving and letting go. Days like today...when I woke before sunrise and practiced on your silent predawn bliss. When I run into incredible friends and stay for leisurely chats as if the world has nowhere for me to be. When the sun kisses my skin and reminds me how important it is to give gratitude for the warmth of life and feeling. Days like today fill my soul and make me feel as though all the pieces of the world are in place...and I wonder...should I stay here forever...as if forever exists...but then inevitably...some of your undercurrent shows Sent Lisi and I find myself trembling inside...longing for space to tear my heart out and scream...how can you be so ugly while maintaining such a beautiful face.

It's true I've been struggling and my emotional state has been so unbalanced. These life changes that are on my horizon are nothing less than magnificent and pulling me in a million directions. It's true that my mainfestation skills are seemingly on point which draws from all directions...it may even be true that I have a little negative karma that needs working out...but this place...this angst...you can keep it. And you should tuck it far away in a place that no one has to see. Being verbally assaulted, ridiculed, disrespected, shamed, cursed at, and belittled for an entire bus ride home simply because I was there and you were drunk. It's not okay. It's not okay. Sitting around while it's occurring and laughing...it's not okay. Not saying anything...it's not okay. If you came to my country or my town or were in my space and someone treated you the way you did me...I would speak out for you. I would stop your hatred because it's wrong. But I am here...living and loving in your country and you do not for me Sent Lisi.

My heart aches today for the disenfranchised. For the voiceless. My heart aches for you Sent Lisi and the message you are sending to your visitors...because while this has been my home...it is forever yours. And if you do not stand for it...it will fall. I wish for no one to ever feel the way I did on that bus this afternoon. I wish for no one to have to hold back tears and wonder what they could or should do. I wish for you to never feel that way and for no one to ever put you in that position and if I am ever given the opportunity to stand for you...I will...a hundred times. Because that is love. Universal Love.

Tomorrow I will wake up Sent Lisi and I will rise with your predawn soul. And I will whisper on your winds for a quieter storm to pass through. And peace to lift you up.

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